


Setting Boundaries

by MaddieandChimney



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:28:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24916870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaddieandChimney/pseuds/MaddieandChimney
Summary: Maddie, stressed and sick, says something completely out of line to Chimney in the middle of an argument.
Relationships: Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han
Comments: 4
Kudos: 19
Collections: Madney One-Shots





	Setting Boundaries

“Just… stop smothering me! This is exactly what Doug would do to me and I need you to stop!” It seems to be the catalyst that forces Chimney to stop in his tracks, a devastated look on his face as she just takes a deep breath. She wants to say it came out wrong but she knows she meant it, she knows smothered and trapped is exactly what she’s been feeling for the past few days.

The morning sickness had gone from bad to worse, and at first, Chimney’s rubbing of her back, running his fingers through her hair and soothing words had been what she needed. But then there was the phoning Sue to tell her she wouldn’t be going in that day, and the practically force-feeding her food she didn’t want, waking her up to check on her… Maddie was _exhausted_ which made everything ten times worse alongside the pregnancy hormones.

Maddie bites down on her lip when the silence completely overshadows everything else, before she takes a breath, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to… compare you to him. I-I… it didn’t come out right, but I just… I feel trapped, Howie. I’m not dying, I’m not your mother,” He flinches, and there’s her second mistake of the night, she supposes she’s really on a roll. “It’s just morning sickness, it’ll pass eventually but I need you to please, please _stop.”_

Her voice cracks as she rambles on but she can tell by the look in his eyes that she’s already lost him. “Baby, please… I’m sorry, okay? My head is all over the place, I’m so exhausted.” The woman risks reaching out to take his hand, and he flinches back just as she expected, her hand dropping to her side.

Her mouth opens once more, but this time, he interrupts her before she can let out another apology. “It’s fine. I’ll just… I think I need to sleep on the couch tonight but it’s fine, really. I think it’s good to get some space between us.” His voice is null of any emotion, and really, she knows she shouldn’t expect anything else.

There’s no argument on her side, knowing he’s right – just one night of space will do them both the world of good and she expects, by the time they’re both done with work the next day, things will be back to normal. “Good night then?”

The grunted response when he sinks down onto the couch is all she gets and it hurts even if, on some level, it’s what she wanted. She hates herself for it, but she’s glad to feel at least a little peace when she’s in the bed on her own and Chimney isn’t instructing her to lay on her side, brushing his fingers through his hair.

By the time she wakes up, she kind of misses him. It’s rare that she wakes up in a bed without him, that she opens her eyes and doesn’t see his face first. The first thing she hears that morning is the gentle shutting of the apartment door when he leaves for work, without a kiss goodbye or even an acknowledgment.

Work is thankfully busy, busy enough to keep her mind off everything going on at home. Twelve-hours of non-stop calls alongside a few laughs with her best friend and thankfully, no incidents of throwing up for the first time in a few days is enough to put her in a good mood despite everything going on at home. She _almost_ forgets that anything happened at all if it weren’t for the fact he hadn’t text her all day, despite her trying to reach out to him.

When she makes her way home, she just hopes he’s calmed down enough to truly accept her apology, grabbing his favourite take out on the way home, a pack of beers and the DVD of some new action movie he’s been chatting about for ages. Hoping, more than anything, that it’s enough to soften the impact her words must have had on him the night before.

Maddie grimaces at the memory, wishing she hadn’t let her emotions get the best of her, that she hadn’t felt the need to say everything that came into her head out loud. It was something Doug had literally beaten out of her, after years of wearing her down but now that she was safe…

She shakes that thought off and bites down on her lip, struggling to get the door to their apartment open for just a moment until she forces a smile on her face the moment she gets it open. “I come bearing food, beer and that movie you wanted to watch and also me if you’ll….”

Her smile drops the moment their eyes meet – his red, tired looking eyes quickly darting away from hers and she knows she hasn’t been forgiven. Not yet. She’s willing to persevere though, willing to apologise a thousand times over just to see that smile on his face once more. “I got all your favourites.” Is her first attempt at foraging some form of connection between them, her frown deepening when all she gets is a shrug of the shoulders from the usually loving man.

She guesses she kind of asked for him to back off, though she’s used to him rushing to the door the moment she walks in with bags and stealing them from her. But she’s quick to remind herself that she had, barely twenty-four-hours previously, told him to back off, moving to set the bags on the side instead. “I’m sorry about last night, Howie. I didn’t… I shouldn’t have said what I did, it was wrong and I hate that I’ve hurt you. T-that you’re crying because of me…”

She hates it, but the anger starts to bubble up inside of her when she reaches out to touch his shoulder and he flinches away as though she’s burnt him. Watching as he scrambles up from his seat as she bites down on her lip, “W-why are you acting…?” Her mouth is dry, the tears building as her bottom lip quivers in that tell-tale sign that she’s about to burst into tears. Usually, just the sight is enough to drive Chimney forward, for him to wrap her in his arms but this time, he steps back.

“Just giving you what you wanted.” He mumbles, scratching the back of his neck, looking everywhere but her.

“I wanted you to stop hovering over me all the time, I didn’t w-want… I don’t understand why you’re acting like this? I apologised.” She flinches when he takes another step back, when she moves towards him until his back is pressed against the wall and she dares herself to move closer. Until she sees the look on his face… almost as though he’s afraid of something, of her? It’s enough to cause her to freeze on the spot, the tears finally falling.

“I don’t know what you want from me, Maddie. I don’t know what you’re going to see as me, or what you’re going to see as Doug and I don’t want to second-guess myself. I’m tired.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t think – nothing you do is like him, I just… I wanted to say the words that had the most impact because I wanted you to stop and I’m sorry, okay? I’m an asshole, and I wanted…” She reaches out for him again, only for him to move away from her, a look on his face she’s never seen before.

“Chimney…. Howie… I-I please?” There’s a rush of pain, before she lets out a heart-broken sob, just enough for him to look as though he’s going to relent.

“Was emotional manipulation on the long list of—” She doesn’t know if it’s the look on her face, or the just the fact he’s realised what he’s about to say is about as much out of line as what she said to him the night before. At least he has the audacity to look shocked by what was about to fall from his lips, his eyes wide before he shakes his head.

Maddie lets out a breath she hadn’t realised she was holding, her entire body trembling, “I-I’m not d-doing that… I just hate that I hurt you. I hate that I said what I did and I’m trying to apologise but you won’t even let me touch you… you won’t even look at me and I don’t know what to do. T-tell me what I can do to make this better.”

At least it’s enough for him to drop the defensive stance his shoulders have taken, enough for him to step forward to at least close some of the space between them. Not enough to have him close, but _enough_. “I don’t know how to be anything other than who I am without—pretending like I’m someone I’m not again and I-I thought… I thought we were better than that.”

“We are! I just… boundaries, right? W-we can… we can set boundaries. We can… talk, listen… we can… I don’t know, just please stop looking at me like that. Please. I need you, we need you.”

He nods his head, but he doesn’t say anything, only moves away from her, and she’s sure he’s about to walk out of the door without another word, “Don’t l-leave me, _please_ …”

“What? No-Maddie, the food is going cold. Hey, it’ll take a lot more than that to get me to leave you, don’t ever think that.” He falters, but he’s still in front of her within a few steps but Maddie doesn’t hesitate to wrap both her arms tightly around his waist whether he wants her to or not, muttering apologies into his soaked shirt as she cries harder. “Come on, I need you to breathe, eat and then we can talk like grown-ups, right?”

Maddie nods but doesn’t let go of him, her grip only tightening when he tries to move back, “Five more minutes, missed you.”

With a sigh, his arms finally move to reciprocate, “Five more minutes, only because I missed you too.”


End file.
